I’ve been very busy with school and work. Life is a bit overwhelming at the moment, lots of projects due, teaching myself crap.. and failing.. It’s stressing me out. Last week I just about cried every day of the week, it was horrible. I contemplated some terrible ideas in my head.. which I will not discuss. I had a major breakdown – and visited my moms grave for some guidance. It was pretty intense. I feel awful just thinking about it again. I got over what I was dealing with – it was me failing on php – and I’m thankfully back to normal now.

My birthday is coming up quick. I’m going downtown clubbing this time. I haven’t done the Toronto clubbing scene thing in a while.  I felt like it was greatly needed. LOL I’ve decided on a 25 and over bar. Though half of my party is under 25, I’m sure the club wont decline a bunch of pretty girls .. ya know? .. well I hope! OR there’s always somewhere else. I decided on the 25+ place because I am so sick of touchy guys at the club thinking they can just come up behind you and rub their junk on your ass/back. I’m over that part of my life. The bars/clubs around my area are usually filled with 19 year olds that always manage to disappoint me.. I’m too old to go out in my area. LOL

1 year mark is coming up soon. This Sunday. My dad and I will be going up to the cemetery then. I can feel it will be one the the hardest days of my life. I’m scared that all of my ‘bottle up’ emotion will come out. I never talk about my mom with anyone. I still can’t without getting too emotional. *sigh

I’m off to do some grocery shopping, and cook up some lunch for myself. Byee